Saturday, July 20, 2013

I'm so afraid.

Okay, probably just a nonsensical post but I thought I should blog anyway. I've been idle for too long and it's because I'm really doing so much of things that I'm so busy to even think.


I met someone, whom, one look at him and I really felt like I knew him. I've felt this once before but this time, it's really different. You know that person and you really can treat them like a friend. I was really talking to him like as though I've known him for years and I said things in a manner that I wouldn't tell someone I just met.


but true.

Okay, maybe I should share. But, really it's too embarassing and I really hope and pray that he doesn't read this or anyone I know for a matter of fact. But, here goes just my thoughts. 

So, this guy, his name is KHAN. (My name is Khan... :P) He works at Charles and Keith at Plaza Singapura, 2nd floor, right next to Perllini, right after you get off the MRT at Dhoby Ghaut Xchange.

I was merely browsing through the bags, me being me, I don't even look at people's faces and then someone approched me, of course, I was like, sibeh, so close, man. One look at his face and I was like, do I know you? He's handsome okay, just in case anyone is wondering, but truly, that's not the reason why I felt like I knew him, I actually hate many good looking guys without a reason or because of their cockiness, but usually there's always a reason... to me.

Anyway, he asked me where I was from and so, I said MALAYSIA.

Then he asked me a few things but I don't even know what I was answering him because my mind was really on the chocolates I saw downstairs, don't judge me okay?? It was the 2nd or 3rd day of the fasting month.

Then, before we left, he said something in Hindi, I understand Hindi, but I cannot speak properly, but this time, I really didn't even listen to what he said, so I stupidly said "Har?" to him and then he asked me if I didn't speak Hindi and I said NO. But actually it's to save myself from embarassing myself by speaking to him in my thickly accented and broken Hindi. Then I asked him what time we break fast at Singapore and he told me, 7.16 p.m. at that time, and then he said Shukriya (thanks) and I just said thanks to him.

AFTER going out of the store, I was cursing him for still speaking to me in Hindi, but then, I totally forgot it until whenever I go out, now, I'm in Malaysia, but I'm always searching for him in malls, and I feel so lame. Lol.

I think he's like 3 years younger than me? I don't know but I just felt like I know him that's all, a few times, I felt like going up to him and asking him if I knew him, but it would be totally absurd, but I feel really silly too but I didn't say anything. FYI, I'm not some kind of a crazy stalker to go search for him although I'll admit, I did try to search him on Facebook, but the number of search results with the last name Khan from Singapore is too long, so, I gave up and hah, I still have dreams of him. 

And, the whole time I was at Singapore, everyone kept speaking to me in Hindi and I was literally just smiling and shaking my head, when really, all I wanted to ask was, "Do I look Hindi to you?" 

Next thing, I know I should be happy because I finally get to travel alone and do whatever I want, but it's so scary, not because of the people or anything, but just having so much freedom scares me, like what if I decide on an impromptu sky diving front or something more reckless than that. I know myself and I know that I like being spontaneous and most of the time it's really risky and someone always manages to persuade me to not do it. I WON'T FORGIVE YOU!! *glowers*


The thought of moving to UK and probably residing there forever is also a very scary thought. I don't know, it's some kind of an adrenaline rush at times, but other times, I just find myself counting down the days, it's really a mixture of emotions and what more with so much going on in my life, I really need to press the pause button, but somehow I like living in the fast lane.

I guess that's just me and that day, I tried baking this marshmallow cupcake which I got the recipe from an online site and it was a total fail, but it's the fasting month at the moment and any cakes/cupcakes/quiche or whatever dessert made would only go to waste, so, I guess I'll only start baking again in August, but then again, I miss my macarons from Harrods, the purple one I think, must go again and get my fix, oh and strawberries, I really miss strawberries.

Last but not least, the recent scandal on the Alvin Tan and Vivian Lee, sex bloggers, (Alvivi) case, it was really immature for them to post a picture of the bak kut teh with the caption "Halal, enak, wangi, dan menyelerakan" and Selamat Berbuka Puasa, and on top of that they dare say that it was just for fun. It's offensive, NO, it's not offensive to post a picture of the bak kut teh, feel free to publish anything you want, any type of food, non halal chicken, pork, smoked bacon ribs, bacon, ham, anything you want, beef, lard, anything at all, mind you, it wasn't the picture that got them into trouble, it's the caption.

Some people are really being so immature as to saying "What's wrong with posting a picture of Bak But Teh?", when really it was the caption that everyone was making a fuss about, some people should really know how to get their facts right instead of just spreading false rumours. And really, if they wanted to post things like that, post Chi Kut Teh, why Bak Kut Teh? Say that the chicken is halal. Very dissapointing.

To think that that woman, Vivian Lee is a kindergarten teacher is even more intimidating, I wouldn't want kids of anyone I know to brainwash kids into thinking that sex ed is okay at a very young age or that it's normal for people to have sex out of marriage with anyone or how many people they want.

That's that to it.

Till my next post. xx

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