Sunday, July 22, 2012

Constructive Criticism

There's a difference between insulting, complimenting, giving an opinion, and most importantly criticism. I know, when the word criticism comes in, everyone pictures it as a bad thing. But there are two types of criticism, one, the nonconstructive criticism which is what we say people do when they hate on someone and the other, constructive criticism. Constructive criticism is telling them something in a frank manner with no intention to offend them but most of the time, these types of criticism isn't handled very well by some people.


Honestly, I wouldn't blame them, because clearly, no one has actually been truthful towards them and that's just such a pity because they're surrounded by liars who would rather lie to their faces than telling them the truth.


Honestly, I'd rather have constructive criticism shoved at my face rather than having to face lies and more lies. I mean what's the point of feeling all good when in reality, the person doesn't even mean it. Who knows what nasty things they're thinking up in their head. For instance, I'd rather have someone tell me they hate me than act all nice, sweet and fake around me.


What do I look like? A lost puppy? I may not be perfect, I may not make the right decisions 70% of the time but at least I know the decision is mine and whatever the consequences are, I'm willing and am more than ready and happy to face it.




You know when you mean to give your opinion and it's just meant to be an advice to someone to not do something or wear something that would embarrass them and you don't mean to offend them in anyway. It's for their own good after all especially if they complain about it a lot,right? Honesty is the best policy, right? Although sometimes it isn't applicable but, well, in this case, it is.

I'm sure you've been in this situation before where your opinion, no matter how nicely you put it, is always taken wrongly by some people and for some funny reason, they always think you're jealous.


Honestly, this just stresses me out, like, are you serious??? Are you seriously, even suggesting that I'm jealous? If I was, I'd be "OMG,I'm so jello" and I'd actually say that or I would give you a hint that I'm jealous. But, to assume or state that I'm jealous when there's absolutely no reason at all for me to be jealous is just, well, ABSURD! Especially when it's online and they are words of opinion and there are no words being said or facial expression being showed. 



Constructive criticism isn't always taken well, but when someone says I'm jealous and they insult me, just shows who they are and I have no problem with that. Because sooner or later, they're going to show their real colour and the sooner the better.

Why?







True and guaranteed 99.9% of the time. Just like germs, but in this case, we can eradicate ourselves from that 0.1%.

The best response to those kind of people is as I've always said, kindness in return. Be as nice as possible to that person and let them eat their heart out. If you hate them and if you say something bad to them or about them, then it's just going to show that you're the same as them. If they don't know how to respect your opinion and act like a (due to lack of words) whore, then as I said before, demand respect. But in this case, ignorance isn't going to cut it. So, be super duper nice to them and honestly, revenge is sweet. Trust me.




At the end of the day, you're going to be so proud for not mistreating someone or for hurting anyone but at the same time, the person who did you wrong is going to see what type of person you are. Calm people aren't always scared and their mind isn't a blank canvas. People should learn this now because seems like they take it for granted and in return, *HEADSHOT* ,yes, in their faces.



These type of people are bullies, maybe not the type portrayed in movies, where the fat boys pick on the smallest kids in school. But this is definitely a form of bullying and indeed, bullies take things from you and they tease you, insult you and try to bring you down because you have something they don't and confidence of someone can really piss off those insecure and hateful people. I do sometimes, feel like chopping some people, everyone does, but that doesn't mean I would because killing someone isn't going to solve anything and besides, I'd like to let them live to see how much better I am than them.

Of course, I'm in no way generalizing people, there are just some people who act this way and it's actually a shame, because people try so hard, going around promoting world peace  and here they are, especially in developed or developing countries, trying to cause a war. Genius.

BURN, BABY, BURN!

Till' my next post. xx

Friday, July 20, 2012

Respect

Respect is defined as:

1.
esteem for or a sense of the worth or excellence of person, a personal quality or ability, or something considered as a manifestation of a personal quality or ability: I have great respect for her judgment.
2.
deference to a right, privilege, privileged position, or someone or something considered to have certain rights orprivileges; proper acceptance or courtesy; acknowledgment:respect for a suspect's right to counsel; to show respect for the flag; respect for the elderly.
3.
the condition of being esteemed or honored: to be held in respect.

I do believe that respect is something that should be given and not only received. Many a times, we don't appreciate the amount of respect that people have towards us and that is just sad. Simply saying, respect is taken for granted. 

Look, just because a person likes you, it doesn't mean that their respect can be taken for granted. If a person hates you, then it's clear that you've lost their respect but not all the time as sometimes, you don't have to like the person to respect them. For example, your teachers. I'm giving teachers as an example because (not to disrespect them) but most of the time, they are very much like a terrorist, forcing knowledge upon us and resisting our questions and we hate that. (not all teachers are the same) But this exact thing that drives us crazy doesn't make us throw a fit and march out of the classroom right? That's because our parents taught us to respect our elders.

But nowadays, I'm constantly facing people that just don't know how to respect people's privacy, personal emotions, in short, they are the ones I call emotional terrorists. Those who inflict emotional pain and psychologically torment you. 

I for one have had it with these kind of people. I don't let myself be pushed around by worthless people. My time and energy can be channeled elsewhere and honestly, I'm not interested in petty things that are directed at me in any way at all.

Respect covers a wide range of things, skin colour, idea, music, interest, height, weight, sexual orientation and the list goes on and on. 
Respect is truly something you earn not something given. But sometimes, respect can be a gift and when you don't value that gift, when you take that gift for granted, it just becomes useless and what do you do with useless things? You throw it away. When you throw away the respect from people, it's like throwing away the gift given to you in front of their face. Be sure that you'll have your respect thrown in the drain in front of your face as well. If you don't know how to give respect, you don't deserve to be respected at all.


When you have every right to be respected, when you have done nothing wrong and people take your respect for granted, what you got to do it demand it. Yes, demand it. How? By not giving your respect in return. You don't deserve to be treated like sh*t. No one does. No one has the rights to revoke your happiness when you give them no permission to. Remember, there is always that delete button in real life called ignorance. 

You know when they say ignorance is bliss? Well, whoever said that was a genius. Because trust me, I've had my fair share of uneducated people mistreating me and the best revenge is to ignore them. Let them do whatever they want, let them say whatever they want. Don't give a damn. It will get them vexed as hell to know that you're alright. To know that you don't give a damn because they're angry and they're screaming but you're there, taking a swig out of your favourite drink, not giving a hoot about what they say.

They will tire out and in the end, you'd be the victor. People like this are rubbish. They don't deserve the respect given and they take yours for granted. No matter how much you try to forgive them and no matter how many times you forgive them, they will never change. Unless of course there is a reason, but that's just a one-in-a-million thing.


This is true. Who cares what anybody thinks about you. They are nobody to judge. They're not God and only you know yourself best. But if you don't care what others think and you choose to ignore and take everything for granted, then, I honestly have no respect for you. (I hope you're not though :/)

Remember this?


This is Pele and Bobby Moore in the 1970 World Cup. This is them trading jerseys to counteract racism. Two men who were willing to let racism past them. Note that the 1970 World Cup was marred with racism. 

Even now, racism is not the thing of the past. We still have to deal with it everyday. I'm not exactly fair, yet I'm not exactly dark either. I'm of mixed parentage and yet, I'm sometimes stereotyped to be something I'm not. I'm judged based on my colour and I've even heard some people judging me by my looks. I don't care if it's good or bad. I think people should really get to know me instead of spreading things about me, be it good or bad.




I don't care if it's the beggars on the streets, the laborers or the old lady on the street, I want you to respect everyone. The blind, the deaf, the hearing, the seeing, the walking, the talking, the dumb, EVERYONE! Respect others. Your time in this world is short. Be it if you're a Christian, a Hindu, a Muslim, a Buddhist, a Jewish, or anything. I respect you. One day, we will all die. Whether you believe in the afterlife or not is not a question here. What's most important is how you treat others and how others treat you in return.

You don't deserve a point of view if all you think is you!I believe this.

One more last subject I'd like to touch on.

RESPECT FOR YOURSELF!

Self respect is very important. For others to respect you, you must first have respect for yourself.


I don't know who these girls are but here's a perfect example as to when you have no self respect. You lose your dignity and your respect from others, well, let's just say there isn't to start with. 

Don't throw yourself at every guy. Don't act like a slut who is desperate to get a guy. Don't pretend to be all sweet when you're not. Don't fake that orgasmic voice to sound cute because trust me, it isn't flattering at all. If one thing it does, it helps my digestion like when I eat something that makes my stomach sick, they do that without me even having to consume anything AT ALL. 

Also, I hate those people who drink two sips of alcohol and start acting like a clown and start yelling how high they feel and how happy they are. If you want to play in the rain, then by all means do, but don't be like a slut, jumping up and down so that people looks at your boobs jumping up and down. It's not a trampoline. We don't have fun looking at those unattractive things. You're like a pole dancer, people watch, they have fun and at the end of the day, you get nothing. 

It's funny how people do things like that to get attention when in reality, their self pride is being flushed down the toilet bowl. Their value drops like Niagara Falls. Now, I don't think there's a price tag there because obviously, there's a sign with "public property" written all over it. 

Some people just have a big open invitation sign showing how available they are, how wasted they can get, how demoralizing their personality is and honestly, I just don't see any reason as to why I should respect them. Their personality, their face, their everything just promotes to involuntary hurling. I don't think bulimic people will ever need laxatives of any sort if they're surrounded by these kind of people.

This are just some of my views on how respecting others and having self respect is important. I'm sure I'll have many people who would agree with me.

Till' my next post.xoxo.

Tuesday, July 10, 2012

Virginity and the whole matrimony constitution.

So, many people has been talking to me about losing their virginity, abstinence and things like that. I'm here to express my views, however subjective it may be.

To me, I think that losing your virginity is something like pledging your whole life to someone. Well, basically, to me, kissing, hugging a guy, and making love should only be done with a person that you love. In this case, I'm referring to a person that you want to spend the rest of your life with. Well, of course, when you're in a relationship, you feel that they're the one for you.

To really know if you think that person is the one is to get into a big fight and still love each other. But I'm not at all suggesting you do that. Back on track, call me old school, but I honestly think that it's called "making love" for a reason. Why would you want to lose your virginity at such a young age anyway?

Why don't you save it for that one special day when you get married. Pledge yourself to your husband and no other man. He would truly appreciate it. Of course, marry the person you love not someone you think is nice to you and loves you. It has to be mutual.

Love, marriage and virginity, to me, it comes in sync. Like one has to be with the other. It just is. How can a relationship with love last? Unless you're like too egoistical, full of pride to admit that you're in love and you go ahead ignoring the person you love and care for, then I have nothing to say. Your loss.

I've got friends who has lost their virginity. Some at the age of 11 and some recently and they're all in their teenage years. I mean, is it really worth it? For guys, maybe it doesn't make a difference, because most guys I've asked have got no problem as to when they lose their virginity. Besides, no one would know if they lost their virginity anyway. How would you know? 

It's more of a choice to women, because once you lose it, there's no turning back. I'm not referring to shit like plastic surgery where you can sew your vajayjay back okay? That shit is disturbing and wrong.

I know the media and the social web, etc. send the wrong messages to everyone. Like they portray people losing their virginity and all as a "cool" thing. But to me, I just feel disgusted at times by the thought of having intimate relationships with someone. I mean, how can a penis being thrusted into a women's vagina be so pleasurable. It seems disgusting. 

Maybe I'm weird like that. I know someday, I may experience it myself, but I just want it to be with the right guy and we're guaranteed of being together forever. I mean, to me, once we're married, there's no option for divorce. No matter how shitty things get, I'll try my best to work things out. But, I don't want to have arguments with my spouse although I know every relationship will have it's ups and downs.

Sometimes, you've just got to trust in God, that he will give you someone. To me, as stupid as it is, my first love is the one. So, I don't know really. But who knows, someday, I might find the actual guy who is meant for me. 

In the end, everything is going to work out just fine. If something's meant to be, there's no need to rush things. Just let it be. Go with the flow. :) No worries.